Relationships are important in our lives — they are a way for any two or more people to connect. Intimate relationships are often equated with romantic or sexual relationships, but can be any interpersonal relationship that involves physical and/or emotional intimacy. This can include a romantic partner, friends, family, loved ones, or sexual relationships. Since relationships are important in our lives, it’s helpful to think about the types of relationships we currently have, what we seek, and whether or not they are healthy relationships.

Relationship Spectrum

CONFIDENTIAL HELP
Call the Wellness Exchange Hotline at (212) 443-9999 or chat via the app anytime and ask for a Crisis Response Counselor (CRC). They can talk through your medical, mental health, and legal options and meet with you in person. Available 24 hours a day, every day.

Immediate Safety Concerns

  • If you have experienced physical or sexual violence and are in imminent danger, you can call 911 for an emergency response. This is an individual choice — some do not feel that contacting police is the safest option, even in a crisis.
  • If you are injured and need immediate medical attention, you can call 911 for medical care or go to your nearest emergency room.
    NYC hospitals are only required to contact police for life-threatening stab wounds and burns, as well as any slight gunshot wound. If a child experiences or witnesses relationship violence/abuse, mandated reporters may have to consult with the Administration for Children Services about the child's safety. Otherwise, hospitals are not required to report relationship violence. They can assist you in safety planning and connect you to resources.
  • If it is safe to do so, reach out to the the Wellness Exchange. A Crisis Response Counselor can help you understand your options and can safety plan with you. The Wellness Exchange is a confidential resource that can be reached 24/7 at (212) 443-9999 or through the Wellness Exchange app — or at wellness.exchange@nyu.edu for non-emergencies. If you are at an NYU global site, we have established local Wellness Exchange phone numbers you can call.
  • NYU Public Safety can assist with understanding the police reporting options and safety. NYU Public Safety is a private resource and may share information with a limited number of people in the university who need to know.
  • If you are unsure whether your relationship is abusive or are considering ending an abusive relationship and would like to speak with someone, you can contact the Wellness Exchange or make an appointment with a counselor at Counseling and Wellness Services.

Safety Planning

Whether or not someone stays in an abusive relationship is an individual decision based on many factors. Leaving an abusive relationship can be a dangerous time; therefore, no one should make that decision for the person experiencing the harm. It can be helpful to develop a safety plan if a situation starts to escalate to violence.

Safety Planning Ideas

  • If you have access to a phone, you can call:
  • Consider where the escalation of violence occurs. The kitchen can sometimes have more "weapons," or the bedroom might contain a gun. Avoid being in these places when an abusive person is becoming threatening or violent.
  • If someone is becoming violent, take off any scarf or necklace to avoid being strangled. Protecting the head and neck can be important in avoiding more serious injuries.
  • Review phone apps to determine if someone has a tracking device or remote access. The Family Justice Center in New York City can scan phones and other technologyto determine if they have any monitoring technology downloaded on them.
  • Identify a supportive friend, family member, or neighbor who can check in with you and stay connected.
  • Ask a friend to walk with you to and from class.
  • Know where NYU Public Safety is (561 LaGuardia Place in Manhattan or 6 MetroTech in Brooklyn) and walk to their office if you have safety concerns while on campus. Public Safety can explore police and Title IX reporting, as well as share information on no contact orders and orders of protection. Note Public Safety is a private resource and they will share information with a limited number of people in the university who need to know.
  • Consider talking to an RA, RHD, or other residential life staff member to discuss a change of housing or let them know your concerns. As a reminder, all residential life staff are a private resource and they will share information with a limited number of people in the university who need to know.
  • Keep important documents or a bag of personal items with friends or a neighbor in case you need to flee quickly.
  • Develop a code with a friend or neighbor to relay when help is needed. This might be calling a friend and saying a random word, or having a neighbor listen for a certain knock on the wall (which can be especially important if phones are taken or broken in a violent situation).
  • Think of realistic reasons to leave the home at various times of day, in case you need a quick excuse to leave a situation that feels unsafe.
  • Those who experience abuse and violence already do many things to remain safe. Consider meeting with a counselor or call the Wellness Exchange to speak with a Crisis Response Counselor, who can help build a safety plan or discuss relationship violence at any stage. Additionally, you can call/chat with the National DV Hotline or Safe Horizon’s Hotline.

Office of Equal Opportunity Title IX

OEO Title IX is available to support and investigate situations of sexual misconduct, relationship violence, and stalking. The Title IX office is a private resource, which means that information related to a report of misconduct will only be shared with a limited number of people who need to know in order to assist the investigation, resolution, and related issues.

Reaching out to Title IX does not necessarily mean that an investigation will happen — they will first provide information about options and resources. They will support the student's decision whether or not to move forward in an investigation or administrative process — though there are certain situations where they may choose to move forward without a complainant's involvement based on the factors of the report. A student has the right to ask questions before sharing their narrative to the Title IX office. Additionally, some situations may meet the definition of an abusive relationship but may not be a violation of the Title IX policy. This can be disappointing to students, but it doesn’t mean that the situation isn’t abusive or harmful to the individual — it means that it hasn’t risen to a level that can be investigated. Title IX can still offer academic and safety support.

For more information, review the OEO Title IX policy or contact the office at (212) 998-2352. Additionally, you can attend a Consent Zone training to learn more about the policy.

NYU Resources

Groups and Trainings

NYC Resources