When I first heard of Bangkok my first thought was of Thai Boxing. However, I had also heard of Thailand's red light districts. I went on my first trip to Thailand in September 1998.Why did I go? Perhaps a part of me wanted to go for the cheap sex. But I really did not know what to expect when I arrived.

During my first stay in Bangkok, I was literally overwhelmed by the number of prostitutes in that city. Having lived in Korea and New York City, I thought I had seen it all. Nothing, I mean NOTHING, compares to what I saw in Thailand. It is estimated that anywhere from 200,000 to one million (I believe more) girls in Thailand are "working" girls. The three most popular areas in Bangkok for foreign men to frequent are Nana Plaza, Soi Cowboy, and Pat Pong. When I first saw Nana Plaza, it looked like a sex supermarket. The place has three floors, resembling one of those suburban malls. The first floor contains ten to twelve go-go bars. There are ten to fifty girls dancing in each bar. Most of these girls have numbers attached to their bikinis. Located outside the go-go bars are beer bars where more girls are gathered. Girls in go-go bars are usually nude dancers, but the ones in beer bars are fully dressed. In any case you can buy any one of these girls. You order your drink and if you see a girl you like, you call her over or ask the manager for her. You have to pay a bar fee if you want to take the girl out. The bar fee goes only to the bar. For the bargirl you pay the price agreed upon between the two of you. There are services called Short time and Long time. Short time is quick sex. Long time is when the girl stays with you until the morning. It is not uncommon for some guys to buy a girl for more than one day. Besides in bars there are lots, I mean LOTS, of massage parlors where girls can be bought also. I saw one massage parlor building that was the size of a casino, with a huge neon sign advertising their services.

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When I first saw Nana Plaza, it looked like a sex supermarket

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Now, did I have sex with some of these girls? Yes, I did. Do I feel guilty or regret anything? Not really. Am I a sexist? No and I don't believe in taking advantage of poor girls. Nor do I advocate the sex industry. What kinds of men were coming to Thailand? Most of the foreign men I saw were European. Many were from England and Germany. There were also some Americans. Most of the guys were middle age but there were many my age. Most just go for the cheap sex. I mean you can get laid here in Thailand for under twenty-five bucks and even less if you know where to look. I think some guys come here to live out that Asian woman fantasy. A stereotype about Asian women is that although they're submissive in nature, they're wild in bed. First off you are paying a girl to sleep with you. She is not being submissive but completing a business deal. And being wild in bed is pretty much a myth too. Some guys come here to look for a Thai wife. One of the reasons why Western men look for Thai wives is because they are supposed to be traditional.

It is pretty easy to fall for a Thai bar girl. It happened to me. I met my Thai girl in a go-go bar. I went back to Thailand numerous times just to see her. It is not uncommon for a bargirl to marry a customer. Do these Thai girls dream of marrying Western men? Some do and some don't. Many of these girls have Thai boyfriends. It is not unusual for these girls to work as prostitutes and give their money to their Thai boyfriends. Many of these girls already have babies. Many of these girls are from Issan and Chang Mai, regions in Northern Thailand. Many are poorly educated and have no other means of making money. What they make in one night is how much a department store clerk makes in two weeks. Many are nice girls and almost all of them hate their jobs. If they could find something that pays just as well, they would get out of this business in a heartbeat. Many come from poor families and must send money back to support them. I actually met the family of my Thai girl and I saw that they were living under pretty bad conditions. The scene reminded me of those Feed the Children commercials on TV. The families usually disapprove of what these girls do because it is dangerous. But many don't have alternatives. It seemed to me that in Thailand lives are of cheap value. Thailand may have the reputation for being the "Land of Smiles," but statistics of violent crimes and homicides are high. AIDs is also prevalent although bar owners told me that they test girls for HIV every month. When I came back to New York, I took the HIV test and fortunately it came back negative.